Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Cries and Wails



Poor Hurley. Shea and Jonathan thought it would be funny to dress him up in a little costume. Hurley? Not so much.

I felt a lot like hurley these past couple days. Held captive by a larger force.

I thought that it had been long enough since I've seen the dentist. I don't like'm and I'd rather not see'm. You think I've crazy? That I have nothing to worry about? In my lifetime, I've had 11 teeth pulled and had braces. And before I had braces I had this retainer thing that when putting it in, I had to use the palm of my hand and hit it with all my might to jam it in my teeth. It was meant to push a tooth back into place.

But how bad can a simple cleaning be? As I walked in, the hygenist said "just here for a cleaning?" yup. nice and easy.

How could I be so naive. Hmm..where to I begin. First he said I had 2 cavities, one that we needed to fill soon or I would need a root canal. I've had one of them before, I'd rather not do it again.

Also, I have to see an oral surgeon so he can remove a tooth in the back, which would allow for the dentist to cap a chipped tooth I have back there. "Oh yeah" I thought. Chipped that one on a Bic.

So I arranged an appointment the soonest I could. I had a day off in-between a string of trips where I'd be working...a lot.

So today I got up and headed over to the office a couple blocks away. It wasn't long before I was sitting in that chair of PAIN...and I was bracing for it. He numbed me up..which involved needles..and I HATE needles. I had my eyes closed, but I sure felt them in the corner of my mouth. He let me relax for a minute, then I started feeling nauseated and light headed. I wanted to vomit. "eh, some of it gets in the blood stream. You'll be fine." Sure. He started drilling and scraping and drilling some more and then theres that spit sucking machine..and before I knew it, he was done with that tooth and on to the second. This wasn't shaping up to be so bad after all. Once the needles are over with, its a breeze!

Then when he was halfway through, he pulled the mask off..looked at me..and said "the decay is into the root..we're gonna have to do a root canal."

"now?" i asked

"Yeah. I'm already in there. Might as well do it now."

Right. go ahead and do it now.

And the rest is history. I spent the rest of the day drooling and half-smiling.

Sure. Just a simple cleaning. Just a stupid simple cleaning.

-JJ

Friday, November 25, 2005

You're free to put up the trees..and it better not be plastic

One at a time, folks, one at a time.

Poor thanksgiving. It's the red-headed stepchild of all holidays. What did it do to deserve getting stepped on and spat all over??? Theres a progression of holidays in the eyes of the people (beginning with July 4th) and it goes 4th of July, Halloween, Christmas. It was started by Marketing geniuses and you dumb people keep it going. Theres no money to be made on Thanksgiving, so we skip it.

And you nitwits keep the tradition alive by putting up your dad-gum christmas trees before thanksgiving even arrives!!! You know what that means?

Good job. Way to go. Your selfish and your superficial. Bottom line. You'd rather get to the giving and taking of PRESENTS and material things than to sit down and really appreciate what you already have. It's true!

If you're not American, does that mean that you can go ahead and skip Thanksgiving and not feel bad about it?? ABSOLUTELY NOT!! ahem...DEBBIE!!!!! AND JOSUE!!! Just because you're Malaysian and Mexican, respectively, doesn't mean that you can't sit down and realize how blessed you are!! Sure it started American, but you're the one that moved here.

Dont get my wrong. Christmas is my favorite holiday by far, but lets just keep things in perspective here. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Holidays are celebrated for a reason, so let's honor that reason.

And lets talk about trees, shall we? Unless you're severely allergic to sap, GET A REAL TREE. Don't be a sissy and buy that plastic mess at the store. Go be a man and cut it down yourself. It's good for you. Plus its one of the best family traditions you could have, going out to the farm to get a tree. You don't even have to go to the farm! I found a real tree last year in New York City! So no excuses.

How crappy would it be if the tree in Rockefeller center were fake? We could even put that fake white frosting/snow/icing on it! Yes!

Don't be crappy.

According to Webster, another word for fake is SHAM. yeah, thats right, if you have a fake tree YOU'RE A SHAM! We should have to put in those holding wooden things where your head pokes out in the public square so all the REAL tree owners can throw Grandma's left over dressing at you that nobody ate because we were too busy shopping for Christmas gifts.

-JJ

Monday, November 21, 2005

ICE SKATING!

Yup, its that time of year again...so me, Cherie, and my roommate Diedra took it to Millenium Park to skate the Ice downtown in front of the world famous bean...no..not the one at ACU.
I know that guys is looking at me wierd..but the 2 girls make up for it..
















Saturday, November 19, 2005

Keep your eyes to yourself

I'd like to begin with a controversial comment thats completely off topic.

Off all the cities that I've travelled to..and thats a whole lot...Chicago has the greatest skyline.

Yeah, thats right New Yorkers..

Chicago has the greatest skyline.

I flew back into town this afternoon..expecting light traffic on the freeways...since it was a Saturday.

I finally got on the onramp only to see taillights as far as the eye can see.

I was confused, I was angry. I've never understood the concept of traffic. Why can't people just GOOO!!???? If everyone would just move we wouldn't have a problem.

So i meneuver across 2 lanes looking for that perfect lane that is going 60mph while the others go 5. Be honest, we all do it. It doesn't exist, but for some reason we all switch expecting to find that perfect lane.

But to no avail.

About 20 minutes later, I move slightly onto the shoulder and I see police lights in the distance..

ahhhh...an accident. Really the only good reason for traffic is an accident. People injured? Ok I can deal. If you're just ignorant and brake happy I wanna run you off the road.

I finally get to the scene, only to realize it's only a car that had been pulled over by a cop...20 feet off the road. at least.

and all of a sudden, before I know it, I'm doing 75. No traffic. We're good.

Now is a car pulled over really so important that we all must brake to see it???? I'm really confounded by the whole idea. And it makes me angry. I could have been home 30 minutes earlier if people weren't so mesmerized by flashing lights.

I once got stuck in traffic in Dallas, and when I arrived at the cause of the backup, I realized that a car had stalled. It was on the shoulder...it shouldn't have been a problem..only the driver was an attractive blonde with a really short skirt.

And it was quite the breezy day.

And I don't know about you, but the single thing that makes me truly angry, is sitting in traffic. It drives me absolutely bonkers. And I'm willing to bet I'm not the only one.

So please.. I urge you..for my sanity and for the sanity of the public as a whole..

Keep your eyes to yourself and GO ALREADY!!!!

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Women..sheesh

Man, I've been working 9 out of 10 days, with 6 of them straight. I havn't had a whole lot of time to sit at a computer. I know that doesn't sound like a whole lot to most of the working folk..but to be on the road that long..its well..long.

If you didn't pick up on it, the last post was a joke. I thought it would be fun to act ridiculous like T.O. for once. And just like him, it didn't get me anywhere. But luckily you can't bench me.

C'mon guys, I knew women had quite an effect on us, but cmon.

What's with gender roles these days? More women are doing jobs that are traditionally men's jobs. And its starting to work the other way. More men are doing women's jobs.

When I sat down and pondered it in my tiny peanut sized brain in my tiny skull...I realized that women started the whole thing when they wanted to vote. Not that I mind it. I think they should have a voice in government. Don't get me wrong. I think its great. It just didn't stop there.



Next thing you know, they want to lead prayers in Church. WHAAATT?? But seriously thats another thing that I'm ok with. But a whole 'nother blog people, so don't start. But its true.

Now we've got women pilots. Women football players. Women firefighters. Policemen..err..women..policewomen. congressmen...ugghh.congresswomen...doctors...you name it. In any traditionally men's job theres been an influx of women.

So what happens next? Well...if they can do that...then I'm gonna become a flight attendant.

And I did. I'm a man doing a traditionally woman's job.

And I'm ok with that. Actually I'm more than ok with it. I just think its a little funny how we went about the whole thing. Women started it, then the guys came back and said, "hey, if they can do it, why can't I?"

And we did.

Suzy homemaker has become John Homemaker. One of my good friends designs rugs. We knit now. Crochet. We knit sweaters for cryin out loud. We do it all.

Is it good? Is it bad?

I think its fine. I mean sure, us guys get odd looks when we say what we do for a living..but you give over that.

and they will too.

-JJ

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Underappreciated

I'm angry. I thought I meant more to this organization, and this is the thanks I get?

I have almost 20,000 hits. Of those almost 10,000 are unique. And thats in only 1 year.

Sure I can be a pain. Sure I can tick people off. But in the end, I'm worth it, right? I'm one of the elite, if not THE BEST, of the blogging world.

And blogspot.com has the AUDACITY to not even mention..not even a FOOTNOTE...about my 1 Year anniversary that rolled over on Nov. 4th???? Are you kidding? I thought this was a classy organization. I came here to make it the best. I wanted to take them all the way. You'd think they would appreciate me just a tad more.

I'm just so hurt..i mean...I think i'm a little ill. I need to take a break for a week or so. I'm just not sure its all worth it. Almost twice a week I put in all the time and effort that it takes to create a good blog. And I think they're pretty dang good! But no one appreciates it. And whats worse is I do it all for nothing!!! And yet i get no recognition for 365 outstanding days?? Over 130 outstanding posts about my sooo exciting life?? I'm gonna hold out.

If you need to speak to me, call my agent.

-The Terrell Owens of the Blogging World