Saturday, December 03, 2005

Cloudy? Act Like it

I'm inside on a saturday. I've got an entire day of awesome college football on tap. Its a great day for it, mid-20s outside, chance of snow, cloudy, overcast, the good ole' sun is nowhere to be seen. i should call the city and ask them to turn on the street lamps its so dark oustide. Typical Chicago winter day.

Then I glance outside my window, and I see a gentleman stroll by my window, with his shades on. And when I mean shades, I mean sunglasses. Used to protect one's eyes from the sun. Unfortunately for this guy, there is no sun today, so its fairly obvious that he's using his sunglasses to be..well..cool.

I hate when people try to be cool. Especially when its completely obvious . I see people all the time inside with their sunglasses on. Cloudy days with sunglasses on. I can't stand it. It's like the guy in H.S. or college who wears shorts and flip flops when its snowing outside just to prove to everybody that he's a man. When in fact its just proving that he's a neanderthal. Hey how 'bout we start using umbrellas inside. that'd be cool.

Hey man, just because you're wearing your sunglasses inside DOES NOT mean that I want to come over, shake your hand, and want to be your friend. It's not gonna happen, so quit acting like it is. Quit acting like every woman that comes in contact with you is going to WANT YOU because they can't see your eyes. Its pathetic.

I have a nice winter ski jacket from Patagonia that my friend in NY helped me get. That does not mean that I wear it when its 90 degrees outside. I dress in what makes me feel comfortable. If I'm not cool because of it, then I'm really not interested in being your friend.

All I'm asking is that people be themselves. If the sun is in your eyes, put your shades on. cold? wear a jacket. hot? take it off. raining? use an umbrella. Don't do the opposite just to draw attention to yourself.

And for cryin' out loud don't turn a swan into a dress.

-JJ

4 comments:

The Future said...

Umbrellas are for wussies.

Brown Sugar said...

i agree jeremy...especially about the wearing summer clothes in cold weather...I just can't stand it...if you ask them if they are cold, they will say "no"...but they really mean "i'm not completely an icecube yet so i'm showing my cool manliness for not wearing warm clothes"....idiots...i know your cold and would feel more comfortable with warmer clothes so do it..now i know some people are from different places where cold starts at lower or higher temperature...but 20°F is cold weather no matter where you are so don't freakin tell me you feel good wearing shorts...
now umbrellas aren't for wussies zach...sometimes it's appropriate and good...i'd rather not be dripping wet if i'm going to work, or a store or something...but if i have to do something outside for a long period of time, screw the umbrella and enjoy getting wet.
that swan dress is homo...i hope she was booed and laughed at.

laura g said...

good post, jj. and the best part was directed at the guys who wore shorts and flipflops in the winter just to prove that they were men. just so they know, all the girls used to laugh at that. and i don't mean in a "he's so cool" kind of way.

Paris said...

Swan dresses are soooooo hot.